Growth Success

Why Fear Is Your Friend, Not Your Enemy!

Being scared sucks. You feel weak when you’re afraid of things because in society people look at weak people as less. I look at being scared as having fear of doing things. It’s a feeling which stops you dead in your tracks because the fear of something happening is the same as being scared of it happening. Does that make sense? Anyways, an interesting story made me want to put this content together. It’s more of an open journal entry for all of you to read. I’m always trying to make sense of my feelings so they work for me not against me. I’m trying to be more conscious about my feelings and how they improve me as a person. So, let me tell you what happen today which made me want to write this journal entry (content).

This morning around 9AM the doorbell rang and my little nephew who is 3 years old ran and opened the door. I was asleep but the doorbell woke me up. However, I woke up too late to tell my nephew to be careful and check before opening the door. My mom who was watching him was in the bathroom so the timing caught us all off guard. We were not expecting anyone so weren’t prepared at all. Luckily, it was my brother in law who came to drop off a few things for my mom so everything ended up being fine. However, the whole episode scared me because all I can think about was these scenarios i.e. what if it wasn’t my brother in law? What if it was a stranger and my 3-year-old nephew opened the door? Maybe something could have happened…right? I mean we read stories about children being kidnapped, etc. Anyways, I had this heavy feeling of fear so was both pissed off and fearful. I wanted to go downstairs and punish my nephew for opening the door. He should have known better than to run to the door and open it without an elder being around. Shouldn’t he? Or maybe I’m being unreasonable.

The line above in bold brings me to the main point of this journal entry.

When I had some time to think about I realized two very important things from the episode involving my 3-year-old nephew. First, he’s way too young to know on his own to be careful. So, even if we explained it to him to not open the door without someone elder around, he wouldn’t have understood or listened anyway. Secondly, the fact it bothered me so much and scared the shit out of me forced me to reason with my feelings. It made me better, more protective, and more conscious. Here’s the thing,

We often look at someone who is fearful as weak, lower or not strong enough. But, how about we look at them as smart, growing, careful and wise. It’s because we acknowledge something out of place which left us fearful that we now are being more proactive. For example, my 3-year-old nephew opening the door without anyone being around made me realized we need to change things around the house. Maybe I should be up earlier or maybe he shouldn’t be left alone at all because he really doesn’t know better. For a long time, I figured every time the doorbell would ring he would call one of us but was wrong and now know that. So, this feeling of fear and what could happen to him made me think outside of the box.

You shouldn’t feel weak or less because your full of fear, but should feel blessed because you’re being careful. This carefulness is allowing you to think outside of the box. It’s forcing you to make changes in your life or in the lives of others which improves you. The fear is like a red flag telling you that maybe you need to make changes in your life. It’s telling you to re-evaluate what’s going on around you in your life. Imagine what would happen if you walked around without a worry in the world with open arms trusting the whole world? First, you wouldn’t feel you need to change anything because this only happens when you worry and know something isn’t right. Secondly, you’ll bring people into your life who don’t have your well-being as their priority. You’ll be an easy target.

In closing this entry, remember…

Fear is your friend, not your enemy. Fear protects you because it forces you to think outside of the box and make positive changes. Fear gives you a chance to re-evaluate your thoughts and if you’re being reasonable in the way you’re thinking. For example, I realized punishing my nephew would do no good because he doesn’t know any better.

The next time you think you’re being weak, scared, or not up to expectation because you have a certain level of fear inside you for whatever reason, know it’s a blessing and a flag telling you to be careful. It’s telling you to change your ways, and improve something happening right now. I mean why else would fear be there in the first place…right? Because fear is your friend and wants the best for you. 🙂

Helping others beat bipolar disorder. After living with Bipolar for over 16 years, I have self-educated myself to come up with creative ways to live a normal productive life. It`s time to give back by helping others transform!